We're All Just Bitches, Right?

I don’t get it. I don’t get all the stigma and myths surrounding women who have abortions. It is crazy to me that in 2010, people still go around acting like the one in four American women who have/will have an abortion are selfish whores who are totally irresponsible. It frustrates me even more when the women who seek abortion care slap themselves across their own faces with these horrible stereotypes that are just plain false.

Equally, I am really getting annoyed with all the stereotypes people have about Abortioneers. We must be cold, heartless child/man/woman/baby hating bitches to do this work. None of us have kids: by choice, as we hate them. We’re all man-hating lesbians. And we’re super mean and will force a woman to have an abortion. Seriously?

Every single day I talk to women who are shocked to find we’re, in fact, nice. Every single day, I talk to women who are shocked to find many of us are parents or at least have children in their lives on some level. I also happen to work with at least four grandmothers. I love it when we have a staff member who gets pregnant. I feel like with one glance, as she opens the door to the waiting room, a clipboard resting on her swollen belly, she sweeps away hundreds of myths about us. I’ll never forget when our female Ob/Gyn was heavily pregnant, performing abortions. The patients were surprised and I feel her belly shouted something profound about who she was and what she believed about choices and all women. Oh, how I admired her for that. Her own wanted, loved pregnancy challenged women to understand that as Abortioneers, we respect all choices, for all women, in all stages of their lives: so how would we ever try to make her have an abortion, or make her continue a pregnancy, or make her do anything?

I wish I knew where some of these stereotypes came from. Maybe some of them are just stereotypes for feminists. Oh, and regarding sexuality: really, who cares? But if others must know, I happen to work with people from many different sexual orientations: that doesn’t even matter though. I also happen to have worked with people from many different religious orientations and spiritual backgrounds, including non-spiritual and non-religious backgrounds. Again: it doesn’t matter.

This does matter: Abortioneers are nice. And we give a shit. And we work hard with very little recognition. And I hope that you hold your head high. I hope you shout - loudly, or quietly - all the many profound things about choices and women and life and complexity and beauty that surrounds you each day; because you’re not a cold, heartless bitch. Rather, you’re quite astounding.